Thursday, March 28, 2013

The Honeymoon is OVER!!!

7 weeks, 4 days, 9 hours and 45 minutes - that is how long it took for the honeymoon to end.  It is a small miracle that some Dutch person wasn't at the receiving end of my wrath and fury and isn't dead today.  From everything I had read on relocating and culture shock, this day was destined to come.  Now don't get me wrong, I don't hate everything about here and by no means do I want to/am ready to come back to Canada, but rather have finally reached a level of frustration that warrants someone dying!

First things first - it is still bloody cold here and I am still freezing. And sitting in some port, in some part of this country is my stuff.  And in my stuff is my long underwear - which I am in desperate need of.  I mean on Sunday I had to wear my down jacket, my mitts and a toque!  It is the end of bloody March already!  At least the sun occasionally shines. I am so fed up with this cold weather that I am heading to Palm Springs first thing in the morning and by first thing, I mean I have to catch the train to Schipol at 5:47am (and they are very efficient here) for an 8:15am flight, but I digress.

So what specifically has caused the honeymoon to end.  Well I guess it was a couple of things today and on their own, none of them were really that big but compounded with one another, I just decided that the honeymoon was over.  Firstly, as you know (if you read my blog) my stuff is here and is sitting in Rotterdam (I think) in a secure warehouse waiting to be cleared by Dutch customs.  As a part of my relocation package, I am provided with a moving company who also handles the importation of my goods into the country and all of the necessary paperwork and declarations.  What I was required to provide them (and did on March 5) was my proof of registration at the town hall, which would then lead to a "residence card" to be issued by Immigration.  I had been previously counselled by the relocation team that also assists with my move, that all the moving company, and customs needed was that proof.  So following the process as I so diligently have  done during this entire move, I emailed a PDF copy of all of the appropriate paperwork, only to be told by the moving company that they, being Customs, needs a copy of my residence card.  Okay but I have no control over how long that takes and they say typically is takes about 4 weeks for it to come in, from where, I don't know and to where I don't know, other than I would get a letter on where to pick it up.  So every day, I have eagerly checking my mailbox.  WAITING.  And WAITING.  And WAITING.  Today it has officially been 5 weeks and no card.  Then I read some of the fine print, in Dutch of course, and it said that Immigration officially has up to 6 months to issue you your card.  After reading that, I realized that another email to the moving company was in order.

Simply put, I said to them just that - that Immigration had up to 6 months to issue my card, so would Customs really be holding my stuff for that long?  Within about an hour, I got an email back from the moving company suggesting that there had been a communication issue and that they didn't require my actual card but rather proof of registration with the town office.  So through my email files I went and sent a nice (honestly, it was) email back to the moving company, copying him of his original email to me and my email back with all of the attached paperwork, along with a note saying that I had yet another Dutch person read these forms (because they are all in Dutch and mean bupkas to me), and indeed one of the items that I had already sent was in fact my proof of registration.  I do believe that this elevated my blood pressure slightly, as my entire move has been on hold because I/we have been waiting for this card.  About an hour after I sent that email, I got another one back from the moving company suggesting that perhaps Customs has missed that paper.  I want to know - how the hell can you miss it - it was the only attachment I had sent!  I honestly think my mover was trying to pass the buck on to customs because he screwed up!  However before I left for my holiday, I still hadn't heard back from the movers if Customs had all that they needed.  So who the hell knows when I am going to get my stuff!

Then on top of that and staying with the whole moving theme, I still don't have my official rental contract, although in The Netherlands a verbal contract is a binding contract so the place is mine.  What concerns me is that my possession date is supposed to be April 8 (I was originally assuming that my things would be out of hawk by then), which is the day that I return, with my mom, who is coming over to help me move in.  See any problems here?!  Just a few eh?!  At the beginning of the week my rental agent sent me a note saying that we should have the contract later this week - well later this week has come and it is going and I have nothing.  I sent them a note this morning asking for an update and also informing them that I was going away and would not be able to sign a contract while I was away as I won't have access to a printer or a scanner.  Did I hear anything back.  No.  Typical Dutch.  Let's put it this way, they don't pride themselves on customer service here.  I am used to that.

By the time I leave the office, I am in not bad spirits because hey, it is a long weekend and I am going to sit in the sun and sip some cocktails for the next week and whatever happens with my things and my house, happens and there is not a whole lot I can do about it.  So I get on my tram to head home and instead of swinging up towards where it is supposed to go (and where I am going) it starts to head in the opposite direction, b/c there is some big Easter thing happening and they have blocked the tramlines.  Do they make an announcement on the tram that this is happening - no, I just figured it out when we started to head back to where I came from. I was mad for a couple of reasons.  Firstly, b/c it is bloody cold and the only reason I was taking the tram instead of walking was because of the cold!!!!  Secondly,  were there any notices anywhere saying that this would be happening?  No! (not that it would matter because they would be in Dutch anyway - but still, it is the principle)  Rather than take out my fury on the tram driver, because he had no control of the situation and only found out about the change when he started his shift, I decided then and there that the honeymoon was over and that I was done with the Dutch!

I am sure in a few days, I will be back to loving the Dutch and the Dutch ways, but for now - I'm not and it is probably a good thing that I am taking a bit of a break, or I am sure someone would be getting my wrath sooner, rather than later - if only out of shear frustration.

Sunday, March 24, 2013

Finding Friends & a Community

Firstly, let me start this post by saying damn it is cold here!!!!  I know, I know, I seem to lament about the weather a lot here but honestly, these past few days have been brutal. There is a northish wind coming through making it feel like about -40C!   This hearty Canadian, who lived and worked in the arctic is FREEZING!!!!  Palm Springs cannot come soon enough!

I will always be the first to acknowledge that I have an amazing community of friends and family from all parts of my life, and I attribute that to my parents and the fact that we moved throughout my childhood - and of course Facebook.  Friends and family have always been very important to me, and I don't let go of people too easily, so when I made the decision to move overseas, I really wondered how I would go about making new friends and building a new community.  As much as everyone thinks that I am an extrovert and very outgoing, I am at work but not really in my personal life.  I am quite content to hermit at home and if I don't see another person all weekend, I am okay with that - or so I thought.  What I have realized is that I was okay with that because if I did want to see someone or be around people, I could, as I have a great community of friends.  Well, over here in The Hague - that isn't the case and truth be told, I am a little lonely.  Not lonely in the way of sitting by myself crying, but lonely because I don't have someone to call if I wanted to be around people.

That is slowly changing though, as my friend Skye and her family arrived in The Hague on Monday.  She also works for Shell and her and I have worked together in various capacities over the past 6 years and are in fact good friends.  So it is so nice to have her and her husband here.  As well, another girl that I know from work, Lindsey, her and her fiancĂ© moved here about 2 weeks ago and we went for dinner last night.  And there are a few other Canadians at work that I knew before I left and I have them.  So slowly my network is growing.

Another community that has always was a big part of my life in Calgary was my faith community and leaving it was hard, especially wondering if I would be able to find a new one where I felt the same level of comfort and acceptance.  Prior to my leaving, my friend and colleague Jason asked me if I had found a faith community in The Hague yet and if I hadn't, he would put me in touch with Tim at the American Protestant Church in The Hague  I had looked and found an Episcopal church here in The Hague but really I was open to anything.  Tim got in touch with me prior to my leaving Calgary and invited me to come and check out his church and up until today, I have either been too lazy or gone to attend church.  My colleague Marja (pronounced Maria) also goes to this church so on Friday we agreed to meet up and go together and I can say that I have found my new faith community here in The Hague.  APC is kind of a hodge podge of a church that has both the traditional aspects that I have come to be rather attached to in the Anglican church but also has the contemporary aspects that I also crave as a younger person.  If you want the more traditional, you can go to either the early or the late service and if you want the contemporary, you go to the middle service - so this is going to work for me.  Plus, it is in English - always a plus over here and is a real mixture of people and cultures.

Think about how you meet people.  Often through work - which I am doing, but also through your other hobbies or interests.  I have joined a bunch of meet up groups, expat sites and the one that I think will be the best - the Clandestine Cake Club (you bake a cake and get together with a bunch of random people who have done the same) with the hopes of meeting some new people and developing that new community and adding to my circle of friends.  I also think that once I move into my permanent house, get all of my stuff and get settled, I will feel more apt to wanting to go out more and meet people but right now, I am still feeling in that state of flux.

But for now, I rely on technology - such a great thing - to keep in touch.  Between BBM, texting, Facebook, Skype and Facetime, I am able to see, talk and keep up to date on what is happening with all of my friends and family back home and that helps to lessen the loneliness.    I am also super excited that my mom will be coming back with me to The Netherlands in a couple of weeks - now I will be able to show and share part of my new life with someone - that is what I really miss - being able to share things with someone.   I know that it will be a little tough for her because she is coming without my dad and doesn't like to travel without him but also also at the same time, I think that it will give her some comfort to actually see where her baby is living and know that she is okay. :-)

Now please don't read to much into this post by thinking "OMG, poor Heather - she is all lonely and by herself over there" - yes, some of that is true, but I am just being frank about what it is like to move, to another country, by yourself, in your late 30s.

Oh - and I miss my baby.



Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Decisions, decisions, decisions

Decisions, Decisions, Decisions
Over the past couple of weeks, a bunch of decisions have been made – all of which have been fairly important to my life here in The Hague.  The first one, contrary to what everyone had said, you do need (want) a car over here, so I made arrangements to have my car shipped to me in the Netherlands.  No easy task when you are living half way around the world, and your car is sitting in your locked garage and in dire need of a good cleaning.  That is where having good friends comes in.  God bless my friends Susan and Nick, as they went to my house, got the keys for my car out of the drawer in the kitchen, got the car, drove it around to drain it of gas, arranged with the shipping company to have the car picked up and also took it to get it detailed.  I can’t thank them enough for their help and I now owe them BIG TIME!  To be clear though, I had arranged the shipping and told Susan where to take it for detailing.  And oh, she had to send me copies of my insurance and registration for customs purposes on this end.  Definitely not the most optimal way to do things, however I listened to what people told me (you don’t need a car) and I since determined otherwise.  I figure that if all goes well, it should be here sometime in May.
Another big decision that took place in the past couple of weeks is around my permanent housing situation.  I had been out with the housing search company that Shell provides me  and had looked at probably a dozen places or so and then one afternoon I walked into this house and went “OMG – this is it!”   It is the quintessential Dutch house (note:  in the Netherlands, there are very few stand alone homes-  I won’t go and try and describe it as I have included a link with pictures).  In Holland, you have to be careful about what you say when you look at a property because a verbal acceptance of a place is considered a contract, so while I was brimming with excitement inside, I kept a stoic face while I looked at the property.  After we left I said – this is the one, however not wanting to make a completely spur of the moment decision based on emotion, my agent and I agreed to go back one more time and in the mean time she would do one final scan to make sure that we hadn’t missed something.  And of course I did one last scan as well and lo and behold, what did I find, a new property that came on the market that very day and had a more modern kitchen.  So I quickly sent my agent a note saying that I needed to see this place before I made final decision.  The long and short of it was in the end, I decided to go with the last place and that is where it got exciting (or as exciting as renting a house in The Netherlands can be)
Pictures of Prins Mauritsplein 4 - my house!!!!

Over here, you can ask people to do anything when you rent a house and it is somewhat expected.  Hell, my boss asked that all of the laminate be taken out (they LOVE their laminate over here) and be replaced with hardwood (and he did).  I looked at one place that didn’t have a bath tub and my agent said that we would ask them to put one in.  Now if you were in Canada and asked this, you would be told to go pound sand!  My requests were fairly simple, I wanted him to leave the wine fridge, do some touch up painting, steam clean the carpets, put in a couple of shelves, etc – nothing too crazy.  So I can tell you that trying to negotiate a deal over 3 continents, across 14 time zones was not  easy.  The owner of the house was in Houston (GMT - 7), Jorien, my agent was in The Hague (GMT +1) and I was in Beijing (GMT +8).  So when I would send Jorien an email in the morning, it would be the middle of the night for her and late evening the day before for the guy in Houston.  So then she would send it to the guy in Houston, who in the morning would respond which would be the late afternoon Hague time to hear back which would be the middle of the night for me. But in the end, it all worked out and I got most of what I wanted, including the wine fridge and hopefully I will be moving in when I get back from Palm Springs/Calgary in early April.
And my last decision and a little less exciting, now that I have a place to live and I know what my space is like – I bought a new dining room table and chairs.  Hopefully they will arrive in 6-8 weeks and will help to fill up some of my space!




Friday, March 8, 2013

It Ain't Cottonelle

This installment of my blog is dedicated to those things have just made me go "huh?" or wonder "WTH?"  or just shake my head.

Good ol' TP.  Now in the past, my friends have mocked me when I load up on Cottonelle when it is on sale dirt cheap at Superstore, but I can tell you, I am so looking forward to my shipment arriving because I want my Cottonelle.  I figure that I probably have a good 6 month stock in there!  Now don't get me wrong, Dutch TP is okay but is just isn't as good as what we have in Canada.  And the rolls are a lot smaller and you can only buy small packages like this one below.

It ain't Cottonelle!
Looks like yogurt to me!
Now another thing that has completely perplexed me is Kwark or in North American they spell it Quark.  To me, it takes just like yogurt and has the consistency of a thicker yogurt but it isn't yogurt.  According to the internet (because everything is true on there) it is more like cottage cheese or cream cheese but if you ask me, it is yogurt.   And there is also a way GREATER selection of Kwark in the grocery store than there is of yogurt, so Kwark it is going to be.  Plus, you can get no-fat Kwark but it near impossible to get no-fat yogurt - go figure.



One thing that I am most looking forward to getting is my bed!  My temporary apartment is a fully-furnished 2 bedroom including what looks like a queen sized bed but after closer inspection (and sleeping on it) it is really 2 single beds pushed together and I have learned that this is very common here.  I am in the market of buying a 3rd bed for guests (hint, hint to all of you - my door is always open) and unless you go to IKEA, it is near to impossible to buy a queen sized bed that isn't 2 mattresses.  I think it has something to do with the fact that in old Dutch houses, the stairs are VERY steep and it would be very difficult, if not impossible to get the mattress up the stairs.  I typically like to sleep in the middle of my bed - I mean, why shouldn't I - I have the whole thing but with this bed, I have what I affectionately call "the moat" in the middle, so I can't sleep in the middle and rolling from one side to the other, isn't that simple.

You can see "the moat" in the middle - really it isn't that wide but that is what I have affectionately named it.
The one thing that I have seen that has made me go "WTH" is the following:


This is located in a plain (a big park or square), which is surrounded by patios and restaurants - in full public view.  You will notice by the little symbol on it, it is for men.  Fortunately there isn't one for women to squat on.  I am not sure what they expect us to use, but it isn't it!

And only in The Netherlands will you see an ad on the TV for ironing board covers. . .who knew that that could be such a market that it warrants expensive ad spend on TV!

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Ditched Dutch for Drinks

Last night I ditched my Dutch lessons for drinks with my co-workers instead – I know – my bad and I have to admit that I feel a tad guilty for it.    Technically I could have still gone to my Dutch lessons but somehow trying to learn and speak Dutch after 3 glasses of wine, probably not a good thing!  It was a really good opportunity to get to know my colleagues a little better, as well; it was my first venture to a pub/bar in The Netherlands and I can say that I had a very enjoyable time!

Here is some miscellaneous pub food called bitterballen – given that this was my first bar/pub experience, they felt that it was necessary that we order this.   I asked – they don’t have hot wings here.  The advice that I was given was “just eat it, don’t look at it, you will like it” and I did.  The main reason that I wasn’t supposed to look at it is that they like to cream their meat for a lack of a better descriptor and then deep fry it into some sort of croquette – we have them in the cafeteria at every day.  Bitterballen are deep-fried snacks that are very common in the bar.  They are battered in a crunchy breadcrumb coating and filled with a gooey mixture of meat and is served with mustard and sweet chili sauce.

Plate of Bitterballen

This is some sort of creamy thing with a chunk of beef in it - so yummy!
  
 Some sort of meat ball - I was assured that it wasn't horse.

 Bitterballan for the vegetarian (I think)

(Yes I know, I need a manicure – those hang nails aren’t looking too lovely!)

Spring is starting to spring here – it was a gorgeous 15C yesterday, so it warranted some patio time.   One thing that  I have noticed with the Dutch is that it is always patio time – they just bundle up for it or sit with a blanket on their laps.  I am sorry but this hardy Canadian, I don’t like to be cold and would much prefer to be inside when it is cold out, not sitting outside with a blanket on my lap!

So back to ditching my Dutch lessons – I got to work this morning and  saw that I had an email from my Dutch teacher hoping that I was okay – bring on the guilt!  She knows that I have to miss next week due to a work trip, so she provided me with some work to do, as well, gave me what I missed yesterday. . .just like school!

Friday, March 1, 2013

Bastardizing de Nederlandse Taal


As some of you may have seen from my Facebook postings, I have started taking Dutch lessons in an attempt to make my everyday life here just a little easier.  Just so we are clear, I have absolutely zero expectations that I will become fluent or remotely fluent by the time I leave here.   I want to be able to use my appliances, buy groceries and know what I am buying or be able to follow the directions on a package.  I want to be able to read signs and understand how much I am paying rather than just blindly sticking my bank card in to pay for something.  I want to start looking at what TV/internet package I am going to order for when I finally get a permanent place, but all of the websites are in Dutch with no English site and Google Translate only works so well!  Plus for now, it gets me out of the house once a week for a few hours and gives me something to do.  I am taking Beginners Dutch through ABC Dutch (http://www.abcdutch.com/ )  I go for 2 hours once a week for 10 weeks.  There are 4 people in my class, 1 other girl who is originally from South Korea but grew up in Canada and the US, did her masters degree over here and has a Dutch boyfriend, an Iranian guy who is a lawyer and a Nigerian guy – can’t remember what he does – so it is a nice small group.  What I didn’t bank on was having homework and also having conjugate verbs!  I thought that I left that all behind in grade 12 French!  So far I can say who I am, where I am from, what I do – those sorts of things that are moderately useful but not really. I am learning my telephone # in Dutch, which is more than I can say for English b/c I don’t know it in English yet!  LOL!  What I have noticed though after 4 hours of lessons, I can better understand what I read and I do pick up the odd word on TV or when I hear people talk.

A few people have questioned why I am learning Dutch because:

1.       No one in the world speaks Dutch other than the Dutch and the odd African who lives in a former colony
2.       Most Dutch speak English and as soon as you start to speak to them in Dutch and they realize that you are bastardizing their language, as I do, they automatically switch to English
3.       The Dutch don’t expect you to speak Dutch

I am a firm believer that you should learn a few of the basics in whichever country you are visiting or living in, as a sign of respect.  As North Americans we have this expectation that when people come to Canada and/or the US that they will be able to speak English and well, yet when we go to a foreign country, we seemed shocked when people don’t understand us, yet we aren’t speaking their native language.

Speaking of TV – the selection IS NOT good here.  Or at least the cable package that I have in my temporary apartment is not good.  There are a few BBC channels, which are okay some of the time but they seem to have a lot of serials, which I haven’t watched from the beginning so I have no idea what they are about, a bunch of Dutch channels which I have NO idea what they are saying, a news channel but that is generally very depressing and middle east focused and TLC!  Yes –TLC which I watch religiously as it is one of the few channels that are in English, that I like and I can follow.  One thing that is helpful is that it is subtitled in Dutch, so I can work on matching up Dutch words and English words.  I have found one good thing about not being able to speak Dutch is that on the TLC channel, all of the commercials seem to be able some SPCA/Abused animals but I can’t really understand and I just generally turn away because I don’t want to see that.

Not sure what I am going to do this weekend – probably a bit more exploring and shopping.  Might go to another movie or two.  They are a little behind on movies here which is good for me because I missed a bunch in December/January that I wanted to see, so now I can get caught up.  And as I am sure some of you have noticed, my airplane travel has seriously decreased, so I am not able to watch them there. (don’t worry – there is something coming soon!!!!!)  I have also learned that here you can buy a monthly Unlimited Pass for the movies for about €26/month and that includes all IMAX films and 25% off at the buffet (concession)  Given that movies are about €10 each, you only need to see a couple to make it worth it.  Alternatively for about €19/month, you get unlimited movies and 10% off at the buffet and I think you pay extra if you go to an IMAX.  I am sure that there will be a trip to the Albert Heijn this weekend as I do need some more groceries as well.

Check back as I am sure I will update you on what I have done.

Tot de volgende keer. . . hebben een geweldige dag!